Houses of Healing

Building to a Crescendo

Energy is building around here. Things are a-buzz. My whole family is poised for a series of monumental shifts in energy coming our way.

Thirteen years ago our family of seven – Mom and Dad and the 5 kids plus my oldest daughter’s boyfriend and our 3 cats packed up 3 of the biggest UHaul trucks you ever did see and with 2 cars we moved ourselves from suburban Bergen County, New Jersey to rural Virginia. When my husband and I married so many years ago our intention was to live in the woods and it was about time.

Our kids ranged in age from 10 to 20 when we arrived in Virginia and in our 13 years here everyone has come and gone through various stages of getting settled in the world.

We are a close family. So far, no one has moved off into other parts of the world (although that seems to be a possibility on the horizon). We still get together to celebrate all family birthdays (now up to 15 a year) and all major holidays. I guess we just like each other.

Coming this September, everyone in our family is preparing for a quantum leap.
• My youngest daughter (she and her fiancé moved into our house in June as they are between houses) is getting married September 22. Then they head off for their cross-country honeymoon until the end of October. And then in November onto their new home in Charlottesville.
• My oldest daughter, her husband, and son are still living with us as their house “over the hill” gets built. Move in date is somewhere around the middle of September.
• Last year around this time, my older son and his fiancée separated and moved out of their house. He and his dog, and 4 cats moved in with us as his house got built “over the hill” next door to his older sister’s new house. He and his new significant other (along with her dog and 2 birds – all of whom are also now living with us) are eagerly awaiting their move-in date - also somewhere in the middle of September. (You can save money by building two houses at once.)
• My younger son and his significant other have decided to go their separate ways. They are looking at selling their house and my son is looking at a wide world of opportunities and adventures to choose from – any place in the world - coming up soon.
• My fourth child (and second daughter) seemed nicely stable up until a couple of weeks ago when she and her husband decided on a big venture of opening a gathering/theater place in our sleepy little town (destined for some significant growth in the next 10 years, I’m sure). They already have backers and buildings that are being offered to them – all with many decisions to be made in the next few weeks.
• As our children settle into their own places this will leave eight rooms empty on our second floor- which will be transformed into our client center. Plus, every other room in our house will need to be reorganized.
• For the first time in 35 years my husband and I will be living with just each other and our dogs and cats – becoming a couple again is pretty cool.
• In the middle of September we will be launching our new website with prizes and fun for all.
• Plus, slated for the middle of September are the opening of a number of new programs and approaches that we are putting the finishing touches on.

Our house and work are ablaze with activity. It is a mixture of cleaning out the old and brining in the new. Rooms and other spaces, which I’m used to being so well organized, are now a conglomeration of the old that will be gotten rid of, the old that will move, and the new that will settle in somewhere else. There are
• 3 refrigerators in the kitchen
• 5 dogs in the living room (a Pitbull, a Shetland Collie, a Rottweiler, and our 2 wonderful red country dogs) all with their own beds. Quite the ruckus should the doorbell ring.
• Unfinished hallways with renovations long begun but now on hold – there is just too much stuff being stored in the hallways awaiting the move
• Flower girl baskets being finished on the living room table
• Wedding shower presents piled in the hall – awaiting their new home
• Wedding presents being bought
• Housewarming presents being bought
• Decisions being made about how to proceed with the Community Wellness Project
• New chairs being stored in the dinning room for the client center
• Onsite and long distance bodywork regimes being formed
• All 260 or so of our website pages being reviewed, updated and tweaked.
• A new big window for the hallway being measured for and ordered
• FeedBurner feed hassles being resolved.
• Construction sites being inspected and brainstorming sessions happening over dinner
• 54 pieces of outdoor furniture being refinished.
• Gardens being spruced up – it has been a hot dry month here.
• Driveway pot holes being repaired.
• A grant proposal being made to Make It Your Own Awards for an onsite Community Wellness Project
• Wedding dresses being fitted
• The search for a dozen affordable Cobalt blue round tablecloths.
• Easements notarized.
• Front porch dimensions negotiated
• New kitchen tables being picked up – where to put them?
• Meeting the new significant other’s family being planned.
• Grandma and Granddad getting together with the grandchildren to plan Summer Camp next year at Disney World – the resort is booked and the planning starts now.
• A quick excursion to Philadelphia to see the King Tut exhibit before it moves onto to London – that stuff has secrets to tell
• And a business to run

– See what I’m talking about!

The energy is building and flowing steadily toward its outcome.

I tried making a list of everything that there was to do, but I dazed out and started staring into space instead. My mind couldn’t get it – we are going to do all what in that kind of time?! It’s just not happening that I am going to be able to control my way through all this buzzing energy.

I have decided to just hop on and go with the flow. The energy is like an automatic conveyor belt relentlessly heading toward its destination. If I already have a conveyor belt in place do I really need to build wooden steps through unknown territory?

I have some guiding benchmarks – like we have to paint at least 3 pieces of outdoor furniture every weekend to be done by Labor Day. Then over the next two weekends we can work on the driveway and put up the new twinkle LED lights on the patio – stuff like that. Don’t know how everything else will get done – but it will all work out.

Now that I have decided to just go with the flow of things and use these benchmark targets to help me focus, I am strangely calm, positively expectant and downright having fun. The change in our family configuration is significant – it ripples outward and lifts us all up to our next level of life. We are all reaching- each in our own way- for that better feeling as we watch the manifestation of our next set of dreams.

So what has this got to do with you?

Lead with Your Strengths

Psychologists are discovering that human strengths act as buffers against suffering and ineffective action in the world: Strengths such as:

Optimism
Courage
Interpersonal skills
Future – mindedness
Faith
Work ethic
Hope
Honesty
Perseverance
The capacity for flow
Insight
... to name several.

But how to foster these strengths and virtues in all people – young and old?

The acquisition or possession of certain competencies, strengths, positive characteristics, or resilience factors are the elements that lead to developmental trajectories of well-being. These then become the appropriate focus for personal development programs that seek to increase the experience of a life well lived. These personal strengths produce optimal development and support conditions that produce happiness, gratification, well being, and the good and meaningful life. Illuminating each person’s strengths and virtues increases their happiness.

Happiness requires more than simply experiencing positive affective states. To fully experience happiness – "the good life" - one must deploy and exercise their personal strengths. The more correct question for governing one’s direction in life is not just "How can I be happy?’ but rather the question "What is the good life?"

"The good life" is found through the identification and use of each person’s individual strengths.

Several years ago, I became intrigued with the notion of leading with my strengths and not trying to correct my weakness. I was fairly aware of my weaknesses – I have no sense of direction, my math skills are terrible, and I don’t feel comfortable at cocktail parties or acting on stage – to name a few.

Trouble was, I was not sure of what my strengths were. I thought I was good at academics but I had a suspicion (as most people do) that any day now ‘they" were going to discover that I really was not that good after all.

I came across Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton’s work presented in their book Now, Discover Your Strengths. They had been doing some work with the Gallup organization and had developed an online assessment tool to help identify personal strengths. Here is an updated version of the book that you need to buy before you can take the assessment.

I took their StrengthFinder assessment and it revealed my unarticulated strengths. Strengths I had - but had not recognized.

My top 5 strengths from StrengthFinder turned out to be:

Intellection - People strong in the Intellection theme are characterized by their intellectual activity. They are introspective and appreciate intellectual discussions.

Strategic - People strong in the Strategic theme create alternative ways to proceed. Faced with any given scenario, they can quickly spot relevant patterns and issues.

Learner - People strong in the Learner theme have a great desire to learn and want to continuously improve. In particular, the process of learning, rather than the outcome, excites them.

Relater - People who are strong in the Relater theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.

Futuristic - People strong in the Futuristic theme are inspired by the future and what could be. They inspire others with their visions of the future.

My Strengths Revelation

I was both surprised and relieved. I always knew that intellection and learner were part of who I was – however, I never really thought about them as strengths. They were just always there - and now I could really own them.

I was completely surprised about the strengths strategic and futuristic. They seem like such "grown up" strengths that I had a secret ambition to strive for but thought I was too "soft" to be good at.

Relator – I was happy that at least I had one strength that had something to do with people rather than just ideas – since I have worked with people all of my life.

As I was getting into developing and leveraging my StrengthFinder strengths, the Values in Action project began. The Values In Action (VIA) Project, under the direction of Christopher Peterson, had begun its search for human characteristics that are accepted cross-culturally and are stable across situations and across time.

My strengths revealed by the VIA strength survey were:

Curiosity and interest in the world - "You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery."

Creativity, ingenuity, and originality - "Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible."

Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness - "Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely only on solid evidence to make your decisions. You are able to change your mind."

Love of learning - "You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn."

Perspective (wisdom) - "Although you may not think of yourself as wise, your friends hold this view of you. They value your perspective on matters and turn to you for advice. You have a way of looking at the world that makes sense to others and to yourself."

Almost immediately upon discovering my strengths, my whole perception of myself began to rework itself. I claimed my strengths and went forward in the world to learn (the learner) how to use my strengths in as many ways as I could. I set about to develop and nourish my strengths and use them consciously in all the aspects of my life.

To my continual surprise, I noticed myself consistently approaching life from at least one of my strengths instead of being hesitant or holding myself back, I began to relax into using the strength. Amazingly the strength would unfold and I would see myself doing all kinds of things that I never thought I had the predilection for.

As this went on, I became increasingly comfortable with myself. My fears about being revealed as a fraud disappeared. For the first time in my life I truly felt naturally congruent and authentic – I did not have to convince myself – it just was. I felt that I was acquiring a natural mastery.

Giving Up My Weaknesses

The other great thing that happened is that I stopped trying to correct my weaknesses.

One of the strengths defined on the StrengthFinder assessment is the strength of Woo. Those strong in this strength enjoy winning people over and getting them to like them. Woo people like meeting new people and strangers are rarely intimidating to them.

I have never been comfortable being a Woo person. But to succeed in business you are told that you need to get out there and be a Woo person. I spent a lot of energy trying to make myself get out there and meet new people. I forced myself and I got good at it – but it never really flowed easily for me - and it had a lot of hidden energy expenses in it for me. It was hard to make myself move against my natural flows of energy.

Now that I knew my strengths, I could give up Wooing people. Instead I nourish and develop my strength of being able to relate to other people – which I like doing a lot more and which comes naturally to me with no hidden costs.

My Top Strength

Another interesting thing I learned about myself had to do with my top strength - Curiosity - as revealed by the VIA assessment. Not only is curiosity my top strength but I also am in the 100th percentile of all categories of people who have curiosity as one of their strengths.

This means I am as far out there as you can get in terms of being curious.

Suddenly it explained many things about me. Like:

How come I am attracted to getting tons of certifications (it was not pathological after all)

Why I can never settle on just one interest and am always wanting to do many different things

Why I always have to be involved in multiple projects in order to feel productive

Why every time I got an idea about something (every second of the day) I felt compelled to try and make it happen.

It became clear to me that this strength– curiosity - had been over used and become a weakness for me. You know, "curiosity killed the cat". Well for me, curiosity could drive me to distraction and undo my focus. A strength over developed and not used in conjunction with your other strengths can become your weakness.

I now know that every brilliant idea that comes into my head is not a message that needs to be followed. It is just my natural curiosity doing its job and I can pick and choose what to follow up on. I am still curious about most everything – but a lot more relaxed.

What this has to do with you:

Identify your strengths – Take the StrengthFinder assessment and the VIA survey.

Nourish, develop, and leverage your strengths in all the areas of your life and you will:

Be happier

Be and feel more authentic and genuine

Develop a new and more appreciative perception of yourself

Stop trying to correct your weakness and save yourself lots of hidden energy costs

Be able to see how your worst weakness can actually be the outcome of using your top strength without balancing it with your other strengths. From there, you can naturally let that weakness take its place in the constellation of your other strengths

Get things done more efficiently and with less effort because you are riding along on your own flow channels

Experience a sense of natural mastery and excellence because you are being naturally authentic and leveraging your best self.

Are You Leading with Your Strengths?

I know my strengths and I can name them.

I am comfortable with my strengths.

I know how to develop and nourish my strengths.

I know how to use my strengths in every area of my life.

I know my weaknesses and I can name them.

I can see how my greatest weakness is tied to my greatest strength.

I know how to compensate for my weaknesses.

If you answered "no" to any of the above you could benefit from knowing more about your personal strengths and how to use them for more success, mastery and happiness in life. I would love to speak with you about how to do this.

Science says that there is a simple formula for experiencing success, mastery and happiness in life: Use your personal strengths every day in every way in all the main realms of your life and this will lead you to the experience of happiness, gratification and satisfaction. Use your personal strengths in the service of something larger than your personal life and this will lead you to experience the meaningful life.

If you would like to learn more about your personal strengths and how to leverage them in your life, speak with me about options that are available for you to do this. Email me or call 434–263-4996.

No room at the inn

When new clients come into a Mood and Energy Management Program, they are uplifted and excited.

Their energy has been in the dumper, their moods are not in the “happy, happy” realm, and they feel like crap - and their doctors are still telling them that nothing is wrong with them.

They are uplifted and excited because they have come into a paradigm where the source of these imbalances can be found and re-balanced. Who wouldn’t feel uplifted?

I spend a lot of time letting prospective clients know that it will take a big investment of resources for them to work through my most advanced programs – but mostly they are hearing that here is a solution to turn around how they feel – finally!

Things go fine for a month, two, or even three and then suddenly their ability to cram this new life that they are diligently setting up into their old life bursts apart at the seams. I take it as sure sign that things are at the busting point when I start talking about the need to change their lives and they start perspiring.

So here is the thing (to paraphrase Ben Franklin or Albert Einstein – depending on your source) – you cannot keep doing what you are doing and expect to get different results. Somehow we have a hard time applying this basic idea.

If you keep doing (and being) what you are now – alas, you will keep getting what you have now.

And when you try to do more of what you are doing now, you just get more of what you have now.

You can try moving faster in order to take all those new supplements, fit in your new regime, and hurry to get to bed and wake up “on time”. But moving faster is part of what got you where you are – the place that you don’t want to be.

The bottom line is this – you have to change your worldview about life, health, wellness, well-being, and success. You can keep trying to cram all the new health and wellness recommendations into the old worldview - but your life is already full – there is no room at that inn any more. You are going to have to find an upgrade.

What’s the upgrade? A paradigm shift. A new conceptual view of the way things work and your place in the world. Luckily, a paradigm shift isn’t all that hard to achieve - but it does take attention. It is sort of like consciously directed self brain-washing in the direction that you want to go.

When clients in these integral programs are not doing well, part of the reason is that their worldview isn’t working for them anymore. They are out of synch in some way with the growth, development, or evolutionary process they are going through and the resistance or drag in their systems shows up in feeling bad.

When you are feeling bad it is time for an upgrade to your new current worldview.

I have some specific tricks of the trade to engineering a paradigm shift but a simplistic and very workable approach is to selectively choose the kind of data and experiences you expose yourself to.

I once read that if you read an hour a day on a subject for two years you would be an expert on the subject. If you did it for 3 years (maybe it was 4) you would be a world expert. Same principle.

I recommend to my clients that they use the wonderful “Golden Hour” - right after they wake up in the morning - when their mind is easily shifting between the conscious and unconscious state, to read. Best done outside in a natural place.

Read something that is attractive to you that is just beyond how you currently view the world and your place in it. Choose something that is pleasing, attractive, and uplifting to you. Don’t make it the same stuff you already know - instead reach just a little outside your comfort zone to a place that is intriguing and exciting.

Instead of reinforcing what is making you feel bad why not reach for a conceptual shift that is going to support what you want in life? Go find another inn – maybe one where they serve you breakfast in bed.

Are your dopamine levels are alive and well?

Neurotransmitters – the powerful group of chemicals inside the brain - create and reflect your feelings moods, thoughts and behaviors. These powerful chemicals in the brain result in physiological and psychological changes in how you experience life. All behavior has a corresponding chemical pattern in the brain.

There are more than a dozen neurotransmitters - but two of them (serotonin and dopamine) play a leading role in orchestrating our behaviors, thoughts, emotions and experiences.

Dopamine is your excitatory neurotransmitter. When your dopamine levels are balanced you experience appropriately heightened states of alertness and awareness.

Here are my Top Ten signs that tell you your dopamine levels are alive and well.

1. You have enduring, vivid memories of emotional events.

2. You have high self-esteem, the ability to have “the edge” and increased drive and motivation.

3. You are alert and awake, able to do several things at one time. You can move quickly and keep up with fast paced stimulation.

4. You are success driven, busy, active and deeply involved in the hustle and bustle of life. You love to work, party and play.

5. You are highly energetic, enjoy learning new things and being exposed to new situations. You are acutely aware of the latest trends and developments.

6. You are goal and result oriented, highly competitive, like stimulation and conflict. You enjoy taking risks and setting out on new adventures.

7. You burn fat easily, have enhanced immunity and tend to live a long time.

8. You like physically demanding activities, emotional discussions full of passion and conflict and like to push your limits.

9. You have many acquaintances and enjoy group dynamics. You make a charismatic leader.

10. You have great vitality and a healthy perception of reality.

NeuroSelect Profile

This is the most comprehensive neurotransmitter panel available. This profile reports on the levels of creatine, eight neurotransmitters and one amino acid: serotonin, dopamine, norepinephrine, epinephrine, GABA, PEA, histamine, taurine, glycine, glutamate, and glutamine.

Call 434-263-4996 to find out if this is for you or e-mail for more information.

Order online and find more Functional Health Tests at www.evenstaronline.com/FunctionalTests

Special!

Order together with the Brain Chemistry Optimization Profile and save $56. You must call in your order to 434-263-4996 before September 10, 2007 to claim this discount.

Are your serotonin levels are alive and well?

Neurotransmitters – the powerful group of chemicals inside the brain - create and reflect your feelings moods, thoughts and behaviors. These powerful chemicals in the brain result in physiological and psychological changes in how you experience life. All behavior has a corresponding chemical pattern in the brain.

There are more than a dozen neurotransmitters - but two of them (serotonin and dopamine) play a leading role in orchestrating our behaviors, thoughts, emotions and experiences.

Serotonin is considered the feel good, inner peace, well-being neurotransmitter. Optimal serotonin levels are required for all positive affective states and all balanced emotional conditions. When your serotonin levels are optimal for you – you will experience a grounded sense of well-being.

Here are my Top Ten signs that tell you your serotonin levels are alive and well.

1. You are able to focus for long periods of time on one thing.

2. You are relationship oriented and family centered. You love to spend time with your family, close friends and also be by yourself.

3. You are nurturing, peaceful, cooperative and have a great feeling of well being.

4. You are intuitive, creative, have improved mental clarity and are able to think things through and solve difficult problems.

5. You are responsive, and a good team player but due to your self –assurance and balance you usually emerge as a leader in the group.

6. You have feelings of security and normalcy, and love the daily routine.

7. You are self-confident, emotionally stable and mature and are able to look forward to things without an emotional charge.

8. You are a connoisseur of fine food and wine. You love to cook and prepare foods in festive settings.

9. You are hopeful, optimistic, reflective and thoughtful. You enjoy engaging in lengthy, intimate and intellectual conversations.

10. You are focused on the "inner game" and hold your truths close to your hearts. You are geared toward deep and satisfying experiences.

NeuroSelect Profile

This is the most comprehensive neurotransmitter panel available. This profile reports on the levels of creatine, eight neurotransmitters and one amino acid: serotonin, dopamine, norepinephrine, epinephrine, GABA, PEA, histamine, taurine, glycine, glutamate, and glutamine.

Call 434-263-4996 to find out if this is for you or e-mail for more information.

Order online and find more Functional Health Tests at www.evenstaronline.com/FunctionalTests

Special!

Order together with the Brain Chemistry Optimization Profile and save $56. You must call in your order to 434-263-4996 before September 10, 2007 to claim this discount.

Fast food with integrity

I was in town the other day and wanted a quick lunch. It was a “no wheat” day and so all the finer sandwich choices were off the menu. But luckily there is a Chipotle in town. Chipotle is a fast food restaurant chain that serves burritos, tacos or salads with Mexican flair.

Now I know nothing about Chipotle’s corporate workings, etc. but I heard an urban rumor that they were owned by McDonalds but operated independently.

Whether that is true or not, I am pleased to say that McDonald’s food influence is nowhere to be seen.

Chipotle actually has great fast food. They call it fast food with integrity. Their meats (chicken, pork and beef) are naturally and humanely raised and hormone and anti-biotic free. And 50% of the legumes they serve are organic.

The restaurant is set up cafeteria style and you get to pick from several choices of protein (meats, poultry and legumes), salad stuff, salsas, and some veggies. You get to pick and choose and respond to your palette leanings in the moment. I like a little extra tomatillos green salsa mixed with the fresh tomato salsa and no sour cream or cheese (I’m off dairy for awhile).

My favorite is a wonderful vegetarian salad with black beans, fresh salad stuff and guacamole with tortillas on the side.

As a little extra treat, they have plenty of fresh lemon and lime slices to put in your water and give you an alkaline boost. All that good stuff and it is really tasty too. Plus, at a price below $7.

They don’t have children’s menu but our local Chipotle is very accommodating to letting your pick and choose ala Carte from their “stuffings”.

My clients are always asking about ways to eat healthy when they are out and about. And just from my own experience Chipole is a good choice. Unfortunately, I don’t have any affiliation with Chipotle.

Their website at www.chipotle.com is a little weird – but fun. Kind of like their restaurant.

Health information alone will only get you so far

The other day my husband asked me what kind of snacks he should be eating. I gave him a few suggestions and he looked at me askew and asked me if I would just package up those snacks for him. After all, it just seemed like so much work for him to do – and it would be so easy for me to do. He’s a cute guy.

But it is that way with healing. When I do a Nutritional Wellness Program or Mood and Energy Management Program for someone I give them a lot of recommendations backed by information about how implementing those recommendations might help them.

While mostly the ideas are all new to them, sometimes they have heard that information before. They may come back and say, “Oh, I knew that already.”

Whether never heard before or seemingly the same information they already knew, my suggestion is that they actually follow the recommendations. You know - actually count their protein, veggies, water intake, and carbohydrate intake. Really follow the recommendations and implement them into their lives as a daily routine.

Keep a real diet sheet as an ongoing routine until you feel that you have mastered the dietary recommendations. Count up your food counts and then let me go over your diet sheets with you and tweak the areas that can be improved and help you take the recommendations further.

Yes, you may have heard it all before - but the value in the recommendations lies in following the recommendations – not just in knowing what to do.

My real value to clients is in my clinical judgment of what will be sufficient and necessary to resolve the physical problems they are facing – given their personal history and where the are now - and in helping them implement the recommendations. If all they wanted or needed was information - they could just Google it or buy any number of books on the subject.

When I do a program for a person, I know that what I am recommending is not going to be totally compatible with their current lifestyle. After all, it is the current lifestyle that is supporting the current imbalances they are experiencing.

We are in an age where the most significant illness are caused by lifestyle choices. 80-90% of visits to physicians are for problems that are anchored in poor lifestyle behaviors. And the prevention and solution to these lifestyle illnesses lie in behavioral changes.

If the lifestyle stayed the same it would still be supporting the imbalance. So my recommendations do ask that current lifestyles and behaviors change – but I try to make the changes within the reach of where the person is now. It is a tricky thing and what my typical clients need the most support in.

The follow up in a program is designed to provide that support. I build in follow up in a program because I know that following the recommendations will bring up all kinds of resistance and people will need help getting through the resistance. I work towards not just getting information to people (although that has a great deal of value in and of itself) but in getting actual behavior changes to take place.

As the recommendations are implemented, not only will people bring new more healthy behaviors and lifestyle choices into their lives, but they will also have shifted and changed themselves internally to be able to do the new behavior. It is this internal shift that can be most important.

Information alone is not enough. It is appropriate follow up that is so important in returning balance to the body. During the follow up part of the program, we are focusing on supporting all the internal and external work that is required to make significant change – both internally and externally.

So – I told my husband that I would be glad to help him figure out some healthy snacks. I could give him some information and some guidelines and he could create some snacks, keep a record of them and how he felt. Then we could go over it and tweak it as needed. Sort of like teaching him how to fish as opposed to giving him a fish. He catches on quickly so he agreed to some fishing lessons.

Journey to Wellness - Changing Your Beliefs

Excerpted from Journey to Wellness

Because of the predominance of behavioral and psychological factors in all aspects of health and well-being in determining lifestyle choices, understanding behavior and how people change can have the key role to play in improving health and health care. In some research done by Essi Systems - a research based consulting firm - they found that the only factor with significant relationship to a person’s ability to cope with work related stress is personal power. "Our testing revealed that out of 21 stress related factors we examined, personal power was the only factor that could predict who got sick and who stayed healthy in work situations with high amounts of pressure." (Childre, 1994)

Assisting people in changing their attitudes and moving from "helplessness and hopelessness to the determined optimism of the little engine that could" (Belar, 1996) is necessary. Increasing personal power and self-belief become essential foundations for action.

Developing a longevity preventive approach can encompass mental and physical health and all aspects of well being. In one APA survey of 1200 men and women in the United States more than 8 in 10 people surveyed said they believed that good psychological health plays an important role in maintaining good physical health. In a separate series of focus groups it was revealed that the public believes strongly in a connection between the mind and the body and saw psychological and behavioral services as "an important part of treatment for physical illness and disease, enhancing both the ability to cope with the disease and the recovery from it." (Newman, et. Al., 1996)

In our evolution towards addressing total health care and wellness concerns we can focus on all aspects of health and wellness throughout our life span in all the developmental stages of human growth. In order to improve the quality of our life we can take the lead in balancing beliefs that favor hospitalization and acute care with beliefs and programs that promote shifting from focusing on taking something to alleviate symptoms to looking at behavioral changes that are needed for long term preventive care. The split between mind and body is no longer useful in understanding health care and health and well being and we can be the advocate for its elimination. A comprehensive knowledge base can be built based on both clinical and scientific practice as we move towards a way of living with a much broader involvement and influence that will improve the total life span and its quality for millions of people. Our medical system is ill equipped by itself to do this but we can take the lead by understanding the importance of mind and behavior and how they impact how long and well we live.

Can you handle a little feedback?

Do you like to get feedback?

It can sure be annoying when you didn’t ask for it – am I right?

Even when you do ask for it sometimes it turns out that you would rather not have that feedback.

But if you want to get better at some particular skill feedback is an essential tool.

Years ago, after my husband’s heart valve replacement surgery, we tried HeartMath’s Freeze Framer heart rate variability biofeedback software. It's fun and it works. You can actually see as your stress levels relax into "the Zone." And it is gratifying to see your progress graphed over time.

But we wanted something that was more mobile and that we could use easily throughout the day. For that the new emWave Personal Stress Reliever is perfect so for our birthdays my husband and I bought ourselves one.

The emWave is a palm sized biofeedback type tool. It measures your heart rate coherence and lets you know how well you are managing stress with red and blue blinking lights and sound effects. We now use it everyday to quickly bring us back to balance whenever we feel stressed.

I have been practicing heart breathing techniques for a long time and the feedback from the emWave confirms that I’m not too bad at it. But it also turns out that there is a vast area of possibilities that I have not even touched upon yet.

And this cool little machine makes it so easy for me to expand my skills. As with any mastery that you may be building, it is a bit of a challenge but it is fun. I am finding that there is so much value in improving my heart breathing skills.

I resist turning my life over to machines but when they can help us easily reach out and expand our awareness of our health, wellness and well-being they prove to be a valuable and useful tool.

We love our HeartMath interactive stress relief tools much so that we decided to make an exception and carry them on our Evenstar Mood and Energy Wellness Center website.